For Susie With Love

Darling Sue – we are coming up to the anniversary of your loss, and while we feel your absence from our lives, your presence is all around.  I will forever associate you with those happy, carefree times we shared at No: 60, while growing up.  You were another sister as well as cousin and friend.  You were also my confidante.  Do you remember the long, long chats we had about the problems we read on the Jackie mag Agony Aunt column, and how seriously we took it?!  Looking back, the stories were almost all made up, but how we loved them, and how we tried to solve all those problems that teenage girls like us were going through!  And the scramble to be the first to read the magazine!  As always, you were the one who gave way.  And that was your way – you never resisted.  I recently heard the theme song from “Beaches” and there is a bit in it which could have been written for you.  It makes me sad.:

“You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.
So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strength.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain”

Sometimes I feel guilty that we took advantage of your sweet nature – you always shared the lovely clothes you had and never minded if I chose the outfit you wanted to wear.  But that was you, Susie – sweet, gentle and not a mean streak in you.  We were so close back then and then life got in the way as we grew up and followed the paths in life we chose.  Somehow the closeness faded through geographical distance, but you were there for me when I was diagnosed with BC – the first cousin to ring me, to write to me and talk me through it.  And all the while you were going through an even tougher time yourself.

I miss you.  They say God takes his own early.  How true.  I told your Mum that the mould was broken after you were made.  You were unique and a one-off special.  And will always be special.

My love, always, and till we are reunited once again. 

Marilyn